Our journey began in August 2023, when we experienced something no parent should ever have to go through. We lost our beautiful baby girl, Willow, at 17 weeks gestation due to a chromosome disorder. It was the most heart-wrenching experience of our lives. We never imagined this would happen to us, and in those first few weeks and months, our world felt like it had fallen apart.
We were suddenly thrown into a world of grief we didn’t understand — a world of hospital appointments that ended in heartbreak, and days that blurred together as we tried to process what had happened. Our grief was raw and consuming. We longed for the little girl we would never get to hold, to see grow, to hear laugh.
As we began to come to terms with our loss, we tried to find ways to keep Willow’s memory alive — to make sure she would always be part of our family, even though she wasn’t physically with us. But grief doesn’t follow a straight line, and we quickly learned that some days would be harder than others.
Fast forward to November 2023 — just three months later — we found out we were pregnant again. It was a moment filled with so many emotions: joy, hope, disbelief, and fear all rolled into one. We desperately wanted to feel excited, but the anxiety that came with this pregnancy was overwhelming. Every scan, every hospital appointment came with a rush of “what ifs.” Would it happen again? Could we survive another loss?
Those months were filled with mixed emotions — trying to balance our love for this new little life with the grief we still carried for Willow. The fear was real, but so was the love. And finally, in August 2024 — almost exactly one year to the date we lost Willow — we welcomed our beautiful rainbow baby Lottie into the world. We truly believe her big sister sent her down to us.
When we first held her, there was an overwhelming sense of gratitude and love — but also a quiet sadness. Because while our hearts were full, they would never be completely whole. We often found ourselves thinking about how Willow should be here . Alongside the happiness came guilt — guilt that we could feel joy again, guilt for the moments we were fully present with our new baby, and guilt for the times we still cried for Willow.
That’s when our health visitor told us about Leo’s and the support they could offer families like ours. We didn’t hesitate for a second. We reached out straight away, and soon we were speaking with a member of the Leo’s team, arranging counselling sessions and learning about the resources available to us.
After struggling with depression and anxiety for a long time, I began counselling with Leanne through Leo’s — and I can honestly say it changed my life. From the very first session, Leanne made me feel at ease. She created a safe space where I could speak freely, without fear of judgment or pressure. She listened, really listened, and helped me unpack emotions I didn’t even realise I was still carrying.
Through our sessions, we practiced breathing techniques that helped me regain control when feelings of panic or sadness resurfaced. Leanne taught me coping tools that I could use whenever those emotions tried to creep back in. Slowly, the fog started to lift. I began to feel lighter. For the first time in a long time, I started to feel like myself again.
The difference was noticeable — not just to me, but to my wife too. She told me she could see the change, that I seemed calmer, more at peace, and more present. The anxiety that used to consume me before hospital visits or scans began to ease. I could finally walk into those appointments without the overwhelming fear that something bad was about to happen.
What Leo’s gave us was more than counselling — it was hope, understanding, and the ability to start healing. They helped us navigate a kind of grief that’s often invisible to others, the kind that sits quietly in the background of even the happiest moments.
The service that Leo’s provided, and the support I received from Leanne, has been truly life-changing. I can’t put into words how grateful I am. I honestly don’t know where I’d be today without their help. They gave me the tools and confidence to keep moving forward, to be the parent and partner I want to be, and to honour both of my daughters — Willow, who we carry in our hearts, and our rainbow baby lottie, who fills our arms.
To anyone who might be going through something similar — please know that you are not alone. There are people and organisations out there, like Leo’s, who understand, who care, and who can help you find your way through even the darkest days.
We will forever be thankful to Leo’s and to Leanne for the kindness, compassion, and support they’ve shown us. Their work truly makes a difference.